Getting past sympathy

sympathyHow many of us have cried just to get sympathy? How many of us have acted to fall sick or be in misery so others can feel sorry for us. How many of us have acted to get hurt to make others feel bad? How many times have we used the underdog card to get something that we want?

I bet there would be mixed answers for the above questions, but most of us would have at some point of our life pretended to have something just so that we can gain others sympathy.

I grew up with an older brother and getting my parents sympathy during a fight between the two of us was my biggest defense mechanism. There was no way I would be able to out power him, I would still try for some time and when things get out of control, I play the sympathy card.

But like everything else, this comes with an expiry period too. Sooner or later people realize that you are using sympathy to gain an advantage over others. Not just on petty things, lot of people misuse it to get to bigger things which ultimately become a problem for people who really deserve it.

For example, in one of the places I worked earlier, management used to encourage people to work from home when they are sick or have a family obligation. Soon lot of people started using it for their pleasure, mostly around the weekends so that they get an extended weekend. This continued for a while and then the management decided to stop work from home completely. People are free to take off when they want to but not work from home. This impacted those who really needed it, for example if a person’s kid is not well, then he may like to stay at home and take care of the kid without the expense of taking a vacation.

One bad fish dirtied the whole pond. It doesn’t impact genuine people as much as it impacts the fake ones. For those who use these tricks to get to things, it’s time to come out of it and explore your real potential. Tricking someone to get what you want is only short lived. Eventually people grow out of it and you will be left with yourself. Try to make amends before it gets too late.

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